Submitting your work to journals for publication is an exciting aspect of being a writer. I can vividly remember in the early days of my writing career walking to the post box with the A4 brown envelopes and posting my latest batches of poems out to journals. I sent out a lot of submissions in the early days of my career and looking back on it, maybe I should have spent longer editing instead. But, there was a great thrill about sending poems out and waiting to hear back, even if it was for the envelope to fall on the door mat some weeks or months later, having been returned, written in my own handwriting, meaning another rejection.

Rejection as a writer, though, can come in other guises and having a submission rejected by a journal is only one kind. When you publish a book you have to wait to hear whether you’ve made a prize list or been reviewed, and this is even more strange as this time there is usually no rejection slip, just plain silence. I have to admit, none of my three book-length publications have won or even been shortlisted for prizes (and I’m not complaining - see point 7). There are also other rejections, or what feel like rejections, in not being asked to read at events, for example, or not being asked to contribute to an anthology which features writing from your peers etc and so it goes on.

So, in this post, I wanted to address this idea of rejection, how to deal with it positively and, not only why it isn’t the end of the world, but an essential part of testing yourself, growing as a writer, and, indeed, finding new ways to proceed.

Lesson 1: It Happens

Rejection isn’t nice. You work hard on your writing, you draft your pieces, you workshop them, you’re feeling really proud, you take the bold step to send them out, only for them to be sent back usually with an impersonal, copy-and-pasted statement with the words ‘unfortunately’ and ‘not this time’ and if you’re lucky ‘try again’. Having your work rejected is difficult as a writer, but it comes with the territory. Even if you do eventually get your book published, then there's the lottery of prize listings, funding awards, anthology selections etc. At every step of your journey as a writer, no matter what level you're at, rejection is never far away, so instead of getting overwhelmed, frustrated and discouraged by it try to see it as something that’s a natural part of being a writer. It happens to everyone (yes, even the ones you think seem to have it all their own way) and a sign that you are trying and continuing to learn. Some would argue that if you’re not getting rejected from things then you’re not really pushing hard enough to break new boundaries with your work. 

Lesson 2: There’s No Conspiracy Theory

You may think that, after many rejections, the literary world is against you, or that someone has a vendetta against you or that the world is trying to send you a message to pack it in. It’s not and they don’t (unless you have actually done something silly). The truth is that editors, judges and selectors will have their own criteria for selecting the writers and writing they do, and that you simply don’t meet that criteria on that occasion. For example, a magazine editor might have a theme under which their next edition is based, and that while your piece of writing is great, it simply doesn’t fit the agenda of the time. On the other hand, if a certain piece of your writing keeps getting rejected by a number of places, it’s definitely time to show that to a critical friend or take it to the workshop as the chances are that it’ll need some work. 

Lesson 3: Try to Detach Yourself from Your Work

It can be really difficult at times to see what the problem is with our own writing, or what might be holding it back. However, what you mustn’t do is to conflate someone’s rejection of your work with their rejection of you. When you’re writing a new work, try to think of yourself like a carpenter crafting a table or chair. In the way that a table must be level or a chair comfortable to sit in, so your poem has to be well-made. In the way that a carpenter might inspect their work for snags and flaws, you should do this too, in order to come at the poem like a stranger would. This approach helps you see the poem as a thing and help you understand the perspective of an editor who might be making judgement about your work.

Lesson 4: Keep a Sense of Perspective

You’ve poured your heart and soul into your latest piece, you think it’s your best piece yet, it’s about something that is really important to you, and you want the world to read it. I get it; we get it; and it’s hard, therefore, when it’s sent back. But, rejection, on some level, happens to every writer, and while you may think this is your best work, you must always have a little bit of grace and willingness to accept that, well, it just might not be. It’s very hard to write a very good poem or story. If it were easy, everyone would do it. It takes a lot of time and effort and perseverance. Not everyone is willing to accept that and not everyone is willing to put up with that. But, if it really matters to you, you will take the latest rejection on the chin because you know in yourself that you have it in you to keep going and write something that will eventually work. 

Lesson 5: Subjectivity i.e. Some People Just Won’t Be That into You

The chances are your writing won’t float everyone’s boat. And even if you have written a wonderful piece of writing, it may be that an editor gets out of bed on the wrong side that day, or they’re in a rush, or it’s just not their cup of tea. This might seem unfair, but that’s life, and that’s poetry, and if it matters enough to you you’ll keep going. When I published my first collection, Happy Hour, I’d had several poems published in all the big journals, but when it came to book-prize shortlistings, it sank like a stone. At the time I couldn’t understand it, but now I can kind of see how maybe it could have been edited a bit more, ordered a bit differently and how maybe as a collection the fact it had no bold, discernible theme maybe counted against it when it came to the judges’ decision. But, this never stopped me and I’m glad I keep going. 

Lesson 6: Learn from It 

So, instead of being consumed by anger, frustration, annoyance (which are totally natural things to feel in these situations) go back to your poem, or show it to a friend again, or take it to a workshop, or simply file it away and come back to it next week or next month when you’ve had time to re-evaluate it. Try to look at it in the way an engineer might look at a damaged bridge i.e. get down to its mechanics and see how the smaller technical workings of the poem lead to a larger problem. 

Lesson 7: Don’t Take it Personally

Just to repeat: rejection of your work is not a rejection of you. Don’t take it personally. Imagine yourself at the desk of an editor, and you’ve got a hundred of poems to read, only to be able to select about 30 max. It’s a tall order and there will plenty of perfectly good poems along the way that you have to reject. Try to see it from this angle and it takes away the personal sting that rejection can bring. 

Lesson 8: Don’t Complain on Social Media

Poets are passionate people, and passionate about their art form, which can lead to heated arguments and tribes etc but whatever you do don’t complain on social media. By all means, behind closed doors, with friends and family air away at your grievances, but don’t do it online because:  

A) Nobody wants to hear it. 

B) Everyone else has been rejected/ or is being rejected and going through what you are. 

C) The editor will definitely never want to take your poems again. 

D) Is rejection a price to pay for success later down the line? Maybe, maybe not. But, try to be humble about it and gracious and patient. 

Be Patient, Keep Reading, Keep Writing

One of the most frustrating things about being a writer is that it can take a long time to get published, and then once you get published, even longer to feel like you’ve broken through, whatever that means. Three books in, I still feel like I haven’t really made an impact yet. Some writers are lucky with their first books, and it can feel like if we haven’t won prizes from the off then we’ve failed or that the literary world has rejected us, but the truth is for the majority of writers it takes a long time to cut through and build a readership. In fact, I’m not even sure I like the idea of ‘breaking through’ as that seems to depend on luck or one big moment. I much prefer to think of it as a process of growth and growing from book to book, and growing a readership and audience, all of which (if it's to be meaningful) takes hard work, patience and time, but is ultimately more lasting and sustainable than a spate of early awards which will lose their gloss as the writer’s output dwindles and they’re unable to live up to the hype. 

So, keep writing, keep submitting, keep getting rejected, keep going, keep growing. 

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